Our Economy is Crapping Out But We Can Still Spend $261 Million on Super Bowl Ads

Well, well, well, it looks like somebody is not afraid to laugh in the face of the recession. NBC has sold all of it's Super Bowl ad slots. There were two left for a while, now all 67 slots have been sold. They made some ridiculous amount of money - around $206 million for just the slots during the actual game. CRAZY!

Don't Forget SNL Tonight with Steve Martin!

Tonight's new episode of Saturday Night Live is hosted by Steve Martin, the comedian who once was on SNL so often that people that he was an actual cast member. So we've got a legend on our hands. Hopefully, there's not too much hyping for The Pink Panther II, as it seems like no one knew that it was going to be coming out until the commercials for it started playing two weeks ago on Lifetime and HGTV. Everyone's gotta make a paycheck I suppose. I just wish it wasn't through sh*tty remakes of great classics. Those were my grandpa's favorite movies, why you gotta hate Steve?! Ugh...




P.S. - The musical guest is Jason Mraz

Chuck Bass Has a New Playground

We didn't get a new Gossip Girl last week and that's really upset me. It just might be my favorite show on television. Well, it's at least my favorite drama on television.

Anyway, Kristin Dos Santos from E! got a hold of some clips from this Monday's episode and it looks like there might be some interesting things in the works for Blair and Chuck. There seems like there might be a new hang out for Chuck that will be occupying more and more of his time. I would say that it kind of sucks for Blair, but it looks like she's got somethings someone rather to take care of herself.

Check out the other two previews at Watch with Kristin.

P.S. - I just remembered that the 3D episode of Chuck is on at the same time as Gossip Girl. Thank you DVR. Thank you so much.

Real Chance of Love: Reunion Special...

...was a MASSIVE letdown. There was no real throw down. There was no yelling up in each others faces. There wasn't even any beverage tossing. WTF?! What kind of reunion is that?! The whole point of having these ridiculous come-back shows is to make all the whores and skanks confront each other about all the stupid whorish and skankish things that they did.

Obviously I was disappointed with the severe lack of conflict going on, but that's not to say that there weren't a few good moments. Chance's sexuality was called into question. KiKi wouldn't apologize for calling out Lusty's dead mother. And Chance made sure that everyone knew he thought that Rabbit was a fake.

Also, Cornfed came out with MUCH better hair than she used to have and her and Real apparently decided that they were gonna try and make it work after all. Now, I'm going out on a sniffed rubber-cement as a child limb here and saying that, out of all the ...of Love and I Love... series, that this "relationship" seemed the most genuine. Or at least as genuine you can get on one of these Vh1 shows.

All in all though, really boring show. Vh1 should have tried a little harder to facilitate some fighting because it was totally absent. Booooring.



[image via Vh1]

ABDC: Episode 3 - It's Britney B*tch

America's Best Dance Crew (Season 3) - MTV Shows

This week on America's Best Dance Crew, it was the Britney Spears Challenge which had each group performing to one of Brit Brit's hit singles while incorporating one of the iconic moments/items from their respective video. Pretty much a great idea if I might add considering most of Britney's songs have a hot dance beat going on, plus with her "back-ness," it's fairly relevant as wlel.

- Beat Freaks were the first crew saved this week and the ended up with the song Womanizer. And, they "kilt it." They're normally real hard when they perform, but this week it was pretty much pure sex. It was awesome. Definitely my second favorite performance of the night. I'd say they're in the running for number one as well. BONUS POINTS for showing Fanny Pak in the audience.

Read about the other 6 groups after the break...



- Strikers Allstars were next. They got Gimme More. They had to create the illusion of dancing in front of a mirror. I was kind of bored. I will commend them on actually using choreography as opposed to their usual stepping crap. Shane called them "the truth" though. WTF?!

- Dynamic Edition was the next safe crew. They received the song Stronger and had to do some chair choreography. Beh... they need to go already.

- Quest Crew got saved next and ended up with one of my favorite songs from B, Toxic. Too top it off, they had to perform part of their routine with blindfolds and it was pretty much amazing. Not only did they do blindfolded choreography, but they also added in stunts. At one point there was someone lying on the ground, someone on their back jumping over him, and then another jump-somersaulting over both of them all at the same time! Plus, they had an entire section where they danced with a femme-fatale vibe going on. By faaaaar my favorite group. I'm also nearly positive that Shane said he wasn't a homo - but that he thought they were hot or something like that. Is he allowed to say that?

- Fly Khicks were the last group not up for elimination and were challenged with doing precision moves with sharp turns to the song Baby One More Time. They did pretty good. They're final ending pose was hot. They'll be gone in two or three weeks though. They just don't have enough skill to perform up against the likes of Quest Crew and Beat Freaks.

- Team Millennia, the first group in the bottom two, was really solid with their Me Against the Music routine. They had to use hats and canes in their performance and I thought it was one of their stronger sets.

- Ringmasters rounded out the bottom two and were faced with creating a giant performer to dance in the song Circus. I thought they were sloppy, off-beat, and all over boring. Half the time they were doing slow-mo's and holds. It just didn't do anything for me...

--------------------------

...with that being said, I knew Ringmasters wouldn't go home because Lil Mama's basically f*cking them with her mind every time they perform. Team Millennia had a better performance 100%. I think the judges even expressed that in their comments (minus Lil Mama). Ugh, that really pisses me off because Ringmasters are a one trick pony that needs to be taken to pasture.

At least I've still got Quest Crew...

3D Glasses Go!

After two weeks of advertisements badgering me to get 3D Glasses for the Monsters vs. Aliens preview during the Super Bowl and the Monday episode of Chuck, I finally found a display right down the street at a Path Mark grocery store after a brand new Target in the area didn't have any - jerks!

So now I'm pretty pumped because I've never actually seen anything in this new 3D that everyone keeps talking about. Obviously Disney and Dreamworks are all over this jazz, but obviously there are quite a few others that are hopping on the bandwagon.

And Chuck in 3D!! How could you not be more excited about that?!

Friday Feline Find

This is probably one of my favorite cat videos I've seen in long while. They're just so adorable when they think they can do something and epic fail so miserably.



[via Cute Overload]

American Idol: New York & Puerto Rico Auditions

Last night's episode was a complete and utter throw away episode. It was awful. Probably one of the worst audition round eppies that I've seen on the show. They honestly combined two cities into a single, one hour episode. Plus there was hardly anything remotely memorable about the contestants other than the fat chick that thought she was awesome and had apparently won a ton of singing competitions before. NOT HERE GURL!

I will say though, that I do remember reading on the internets a while back, that the auditions in Puerto Rico were pretty rotten. Like the singers were pretty bad. Like there might have only been a few goodies. And apparently, the New York auditions didn't fair much better. Yikes. With all the people in the Big Apple, trying/wanting/wishing to be performers, they couldn't find very many peeps? That's a bit scary.

So, it seems that with the new change in tone, they just couldn't come up with enough quality singers to warrant a full episode for each city. They did have a crap, embarrassment montage but that was pretty weak. Overall, I was super disappointed in this episode. Thankfully Hollywood starts soon. I'm over this audition sh*t.

Operation 4th Hour of Today Facebook Comment On Air: Day 8

In this ongoing series, I recount my attempt to get my comments on Kathie Lee and Hoda Kotb's facebook page read on air during the daily discussion of their facebook page.

I don't even think I had a chance today. I was very embarrassed by my performance, it was just shameful. I was in the middle of checking my own facebook page and kind of lost track of time. So when Hoda and Kathie Lee started talking to Sara Sage about their facebook page, I was scrambling to get back to it to post a comment.

Sadly, Sara started reading before I could get a comment posted. Awesome Matthew, awesome. There was one tiny silver lining to it though. By the time that I got to the page, the three ladies said they would give something else away again for the people that were commenting. Apparently, you could post pigskin and you could win something. I wasn't paying attention to what they said was the prize, sooooooo boo on that. I was the second person to post pigskin though!

And,to cap off the disaster of a showing I had today, they didn't even do a second facebook segment at the end of the episode like the yoozh. Instead, they did a little recap montage of fun stuff throughout the week. GRIZZLED. So, another day down, another day denied. At least I have the weekend to take a little break from the failure I experience each day...

Early Morning Crap

Watch CBS Videos Online

^ This might be the most awkward interview that will ever be on television. And it's not even because of Katie Couric's hair. [Videogum]

- What is it (other than starring in Mad Men) about Jon Hamm that is preventing him from staying on 30 Rock longer? [Watch with Kristin]

- NBC has decided that Howie Mandell having two shows is a great idea. They ordered 12 more episodes of Howie Do It. [Variety]

- In other Peacock news, the struggling net is gonna give the small screen adaptation of Parenthood another go. Graaand. [Zap2It]

- The Digital TV transition could end up being delayed after all. Incredibly annoying. [TV Week]

- American Idol producers apologized for Paula apparently dissing Southerners. Or as I like to refer to it, a non-issue that was unnecessarily brought back into the limelight. [TV Guide]

- Gordan Ramsey is getting another food show on FOX. This one will be more inline with a teach-the-audience show. Presumably, he won't tell us all that we have sh*t for brains. [TV Squad]

- First impressions of Damages. I'm jealous because I still haven't watched an episode of this show and it sounds like something I would absolutely lurve. [edubTV]

- What do you think about women moving past the movie franchises that made them famous? [Pop Culture Curmudgeon]

Best Night Ever

So many reruns last night! What the crap is that!? There was a new American Idol that spanned two cities because they're weren't very many goodies from either. We were also treated to a brand new Hell's Kitchen, which fortunately, Soda Can from BWE has the funnies from! Start the beginning of your weekend off right!

Best Night Ever: 1-29-09 @ Yahoo! Video

ABDC: Episode 2 - Make Them Do Stupid Things!

America's Best Dance Crew (Season 3) - MTV Shows

Yeah, this is definitely kind of super late seeing as the new episode is airing tonight at 10:00, but what can you do. I can't help it I was out drinking with friends last week when it was on! FRIENDS!!! spoilers ahead I guess??

This week, the remaining 8 dance crews had a challenge to complete within each of their dance routines. This challenge was a ridiculous "fitness" challenge that had each crew incorporating some type of physical challenge, if you will, into their program. These ranged from obvious things like monkey rolls to the oddly obscure and entirely un-dance-ish like the side plank. Yeah, the side plank. For realz? For realz...

Quest Crew and Fly Khicks were the first two groups saved and Quest Crew performed first.

Quest Crew might kind of be my top pick at this moment, but there are a couple other groups that are really close. Their challenge this week was to use kick-boxing in their routine. That worked out really well for them as one of the members is partially trained in martial arts. They had some pretty awesome moments, like when one guy did a back flip and basically ran in the air backwards to the beat of the music and two others slid on top of their heads until they hit two other kneeling members and did flips over them. Smooth indeed.

The other seven (7) groups after the jump...



Fly Khicks performed next with the challenge of utilizing the spring back in their routine. Apparently a spring back is just a bunch of jump-posing. WTFrak? The performance ended up looking like it took place on a crazy Japanese trampoline. It was pretty decent, but the judges complained it was a bit too cheerleadery. They also played up the drama on some chick that got injured but was definitely fine when she performed.

Next up in safe land was Strikes All-Stars. I really don't actually like this group. I think they're boring to watch and kind of unoriginal. Their challenge was the monkey roll. The dramatic moment with this group was that one of their members couldn't decide if he wanted to go to perform in the inauguration parade or perform with his crew. Welp, he let Obama down. The performance, I will admit, was high energy, but stepping is kind of dull to me... Shane thoroughly enjoyed it though.

The other all lady group, Beat Freaks, was also safe this week. They got the unfortunate fitness challenge "side plank." Basically you have prop yourself up with one are while turned to your side. How that's remotely dance-friendly like the previous, I have no idea. I didn't think their performance was nearly as intense as last week's, but they had to do the side plank for half their routine, how energetic could it get? Not their fault.

Dynamic Edition was saved next. They got high knees for their challenge. Don't they already do that? They did their clog routine. Whatever. Gimmick. They'll be gone before too long. They're this season's Break Sk8.

Ringmasters were the next to be spared. Now, I have nothing against this crunching or whatever it's called that they do where they contort their bodies into the most awkward positions, but it scares the crap out of me. It's kinda gross to be honest. Their challenge was soldier crawl. I want to know who the hell came up with these things.

Starting off the bottom two was Team Millennia. They got stuck with Leap Frog. Because apparently the game you played when you were 7 for five seconds before you were bored is a rigorous fitness activity. They performed to Rihanna's Disturbia which immediately won them points in my book. They judges gave them compliments which is good.

And finally, was Boxcuttuhz. Easily the best named of the groups. They got the mountain climber. I'm pretty sure that's just a made up move that a producer thought of when they couldn't find anything else that made sense. I thought they did fairly decent.

-------------------------

And Unfortunately, Boxcuttuhz were eliminated. Did I think they deserved to go? Probably. They were one of the weaker of the groups, but I do think that they had room to grow where some of these other crews might be stuck with what they're notable for. I also felt bad for the girl in Boxcuttuhz because Lil Mama kind of called her out last week and they made a big deal out of it this week. She just likes to dance, leave her alone. I have a thing for Asian girls.

Obviously, this season has a lot more stunt and gimmick crews than ones that are actually based around choreography. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but I kind of have a feeling that all these gimmick crews are going to start getting old here pretty quick and we're not going to be left with anyone all that interesting to watch. Hopefully I'm wrong, but whatevs. America is pretty dumb but they can pull through when needed.

WTF OF THE DAY

This is what makes up my night terrors when I eat too much cheese before bed.

...to enter through the duct work. It's cramped and dusty, and it sets my allergies off. However, it is such an easy way into your room. And you come home so tired...

Today's WTFoTD is brought to you by Spitzle the Clown.

Real World Brooklyn: Episode 4

Real World: Brooklyn - MTV Shows

MTV has been toting this season as like the most real season of the Real World because apparently the realest place on earth is Brooklyn - or you can only be your realest if you're in Brooklyn or something like that. Either way, after the first episode showed quite a bit of promise in being a sort of reboot for the series, it has since devolved into the makings of a regular season full of a bunch of drunktards fighting, sexing, and throwing crap at each other. And last night's eppy was the probably the real beginning of the end.

Hit up the jump to read more...



So baaaazically, the early stages of the drunken, bickering and absolute stupidity that usually fills the Real World house is upon us. I was kind of hoping that the show would stay true to MTV's word and be the realest of the real, but deep down inside I knew there was no way that was going to happen. It's a bunch of horny, early 20-somethings that are living in a ridiculously nice house full of booze. How could it not turn into a shouting match at a sloppy post-prom rape-alooza.

In last night's episode, the resident Mormon who may or may not know that he may or may not be gay insulted the rebel, tough girl who was once a lesbian, and is now hiding from her dad because he might have tried to touch her when she was young. Mormon couldn't believe that she's never forgiven her father and she couldn't believe how Mormon would think that she would. That strained the relationship a little bit which was compounded with the convenient phone call that rebel girl received from her estranged father. Drama ensues.

Now, from what I understand of the story, the dad never actually touched her, but he came close - or at the very least was setting up an inappropriate situation. What exactly happened, I'm not sure but it definitely sounds like rebel girl was uncomfortable with it which is a pretty big ringer for something that's not right. Also, the way her dad talked on the phone, he sounded like a complete jack ass. And to make matters worse, rebel chick was molested at a daycare when she was young. So she basically has everything working against her and of course has to bring it up to everyone on TV. Luckily she seemed pretty comfortable with it.

Next up on the melodrama train - the resident homosexual got super wasted and brought a tranny friend of his to a club that the rest of the housemates were at. Obviously, the night wouldn't be complete without him insulting everyone else in the house. He called his tranny friend a much better transgendered person that the resident transgendered girl Katelyn. He also told the Black girl that his tranny friend was a much better singer than she was. Oh - and he also outed Katelyn to the Mormon dude. Oh no he di-int! Oh yes he did...

On top of all of that, the army dude, Ryan I think is his name seems like he's just gonna lose it one day. I feel like there's a secret temper hidden under his cool and calm exterior. Plus, it looks like he goes off next episode over the gay dude spraying shaving cream on him while he's sleeping. The tension is building and it's only going to get worse. I cannot wait.

It only takes a spark...

Operation 4th Hour of Today Facebook Comment On Air: Day 7

In this ongoing series, I recount my attempt to get my comments on Kathie Lee and Hoda Kotb's facebook page read on air during the daily discussion of their facebook page.

Uuggggh.... Another failed attempt. It has now been a full week of trying to get one of my comments read on the illustrious 4th Hour of The Today Show. And I was really feeling it today, I thought I had a good chance. BZZT. WRONG.

On the first round of facebook discussion at the beginning of the show, Sara Sage basically gave Ellen's facebook page free publicity by showing that off. WHAA?! Who's side is she on!?

During opening, the ladies showed a clip of some pretty riri criminals that were handcuffed together and trying to outrun the law. They ended up getting vertically close-lined by street-light pole. A few minutes later they were able to sample an awesome looking chess set made entirely of chocolate. So, I felt it only fitting to leave the following comment:

Are you sure that video of the "criminals" trying to escape wasn't actually Hoda and Kathie Lee running for those chocolate chess pieces?

And of course, DENIED once again. I'm not going to get discouraged because that's when they win. That's when Hoda and Kathie Lee become the victors. And if there's one thing in my life that I will not do, that is let Kathie Lee win. I won't rest until I hear my comment read, live, on air...

Kelly Clarkson's New Video!

This is probably gonna get taken down pretty soon, but here's K. Clarks' new video for her hit single My Life Would Suck Without You. Kind of loving every minute of this song. Plus, it's already broken a record - one previously held by Brit Brit.

VH1 TV Shows | Music Videos | Celebrity Photos | News & Gossip

American Idol: Salt Lake City, UT Auditions

The American Idol audition process is almost finished up, with tonight's being the last of the rounds. The show, as I'm sure anyone that pays any attention to pop culture knows, has undergone a few changes this season and I think they were welcomed changes. I also believe that last night's episode really highlighted the lighter and more positive tone the show has taken.

Taking place in Salt Lake City, last night's auditions featured quite a few people that seemed to just be genuinely happy to be there. It was nice to see people accept what the judges said with a "thank you" or something similar and leave the room as opposed to the annoying turds that keep badgering the judges for a shot. I Plus, those that were actually worthy of moving on to Hollywood seemed that much more excited when they were given the golden ticket.

Yeah, the more positive focus showcases a larger variety of "feel good" stories - and sometimes that can seem a little sappy - but I think it definitely helps American Idol, as a show, pull itself out of the garbage bin reality programming. There are very few reality shows that I enjoy. Well, let me rephrase that. There are very few reality shows that I consider good shows. There are tons that I enjoy watching, but shows like Biggest Loser that are created to make a real difference in someones life, that kind of gives hope to the contestants as well as the viewer, really hit a soft spot for me. As much as I enjoy Real Housewives and The Hills, there is no denying how sh*tty they are as television shows.

I also have really enjoyed the new dynamic between the judges. Adding Kara DioGaurdi has given Paula a little relief from the Simon onslaught and also helps her look a little less crazy.

During last night's episode, there were obviously a couple of nutbags that make you wonder how some people will ever make it in life. But, there was also an Osmond, an Amy Winehouse doppelganger, some girl that sings really well, and this hippy girl who's parents died and just really wanted to make it to Hollywood. I'm not gonna lie, when they first previewed the hippy girl Rose, who didn't wear shoes, I was immediately hoping she sang bad. But, then they went into her background, her parents' death and so on, and she really started to grow on me. So much so that she kind of might have become one of my favs. Her voice wasn't the greatest, but there was just something special about her. I think it was her smile.

American Idol continues tonight in a two city special.

P.S. - there was also some dude that came in with a big, fat dude dressed in a pink bunny costume as moral support.

Early Morning Crap

^ Pat Sajak peaces out after the gay man wins on Wheel of Fortune. [The Remote Island]

- The CW has announced the 13 lanky ladies that will be competing in the upcoming season of America's Next Top Model. [Zap2It]

- The Screen Actors Guild and the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers will resume negotiation talks next week. YAY! [TV Week]

- NBC Universal has taken another step into the "Bastardize Classics" pool with plans to update the horror classic The Thing. [Variety]

- America continues its own credibility by voting Jay Leno their favorite TV personality. Up next, Paul Blart: Mall Cop as the number one movie three weeks in a row. [TV Squad]

- If you're wanting any new news on House, then there's quite a bit to read through. Spoilerish maybe? [Ausiello Files]

- So, it seems Barney will finally be able to meet is mother. [TV Guide].

Best Night Ever

Did you watch Lost?! I didn't because I boycott the show. Only because so many people have told me to watch it and I feel it's been hyped up to me so much that now I'll be terribly let down. I'll watch it some day, when the whole series is on DVD or a harddrive or something.

I did watch American Idol though!! Oh Utah, home of scary tongue man.

Best Night Ever: 1-28-09 @ Yahoo! Video

Fringe: The No-Brainer (Or The Ring 2009)

Oh Fringe, what am I going to do with you. Last night's episode was really pushing me towards the No Watch Club zone with you and I'm not sure how many more episodes I'm willing to give you. You're starting to get to a point in absolute absurdity that I can't even give you a benefit of the doubt anymore.

Basically in this week's eppy, someone decided that The Ring would be a really great basis for a storyline and just updated the whole thing using the internet instead of a video tape. Graaaand.

Check out the jump for the rest of the rundown.



Agent Olivia Dunham's sister (the drunk chick from Nick & Nora) and her daughter are still hanging out at Olivia's house. And of course, they finally tie that into the Fringe-ness of the whole story.

Somewhere in Massachusetts, some dude has this huge grudge against all these jerks that have done him wrong firing him, marrying his ex-wife, trying to find out what in the hell he's doing, etc. so he uses this computer program to melt peoples brains through the internet. Yep, if you watch this video, the combination of the images and the high frequency sounds melt your brain as you see a hand come out of the screen and touches your face.

So Olivia, Peter, and Walter figure it all out and save future people from dying. The side story in the episode is that Peter is trying to protect Walter from some woman who's daughter was killed in the fire in the basement of Harvard years ago that sent Walter to the loony bin. Obviously, he wises up and lets the woman talk to Walter. She just wants to hear about her daughter. LAAAAAAAAAAaaaaame.

The Good:

- Walter. He's just awesome. There's hardly a moment when he's on screen that I'm not laughing, or at least smiling at his mannerisms and dialogue.

- The angry agent dude that's kind a molester that is trying to run the Fringe Department. He's an incredible @ss face, but he at least puts some type of conflict in motion during the whole thing. It's a nice diversion from the - OMFG, WE HAVE 2 SOLVE THIS MYSTERY B4 MORE PEEPS DIE.

- Peter trying to protect his dad. I didn't think it was the right choice to withhold the woman from him, but at least he's being a good son. Kind of?

- Peter's crazy connections. Why does he know all these people!? Shaderz.

Meh, Just Gas:

- A possible relationship blossoming between Olivia's sister and Peter. They touched on it like twice during the episode. Or more like one and a half times, but I guess that could cause some interesting dynamic between the group? Mostly I thought it was kind of half-assed.

The Crap:

- The fringstery in this episode. It was weird, it was dumb, and I find it hard to believe that some random dude has the ability to create some super internet virus thing that boils brains. I guess this one was just less believable than the rest of them to me. Personal preference?

- WHERE IN THE EFF IS THE OBSERVER?! I'm really getting tired of them not talking about him.

- Where was the Red-Headed Barefoot Contessa? As much as I hate her, I kind of secretly love her.

- Not enough Astrid.

-------------------------

If, by the second week of February, this show hasn't touched on The Observer at least once again -or- a bigger, overall mystery isn't revealed or resolved, them I am divorcing this show. eNuff is eNuff.

Digital TV Transition Extension Bill FAILED!!!

In probably the most surprising thing that's happened in our government since electing a Black President, the House of Representatives failed to pass the digital TV transition delay bill today. With as much backing from President Obama, as well as some of the major networks, this thing was all but certain to pass.

Thankfully, the House of Reps got smart enough to avoid passing the bill, which keeps the transition date at February 17th. The bill needed 2/3 to pass and it just didn't quite make it with 258 to 168.

I'm incredibly grateful that the House gave a somewhat tiny "if you seek Amy" to the bill because there have been commercials for this d*mn transition for what seems like years. Honestly, if you haven't switched over to cable, satellite, or gotten one of those converter boxes that the government doesn't have money for anymore yet, then you don't deserve to be watching television anyway.

WTF OF THE DAY

I wonder what kind of young woman this little boy grew up to be...



Today's WTFoTD is brought to you by Everything is Terrible.

Operation 4th Hour of Today Facebook Comment On Air: Day 6

In this ongoing series, I recount my attempt to get my comments on Kathie Lee and Hoda Kotb's facebook page read on air during the daily discussion of their facebook page.

I missed yesterday's 4th Hour because of the massive amount of fun I was having spending time with a friend I hadn't seen in a while, I had to really go for it today. Sadly, it got me nothing again...

In their little banter section about things in the news at the beginning of the show, they discussed a survey of the sexiest parts on the female body. Apparently, the backs of the knees were on the list number one was the badonkadonk. They could not believe that the back of the knees was listed as a popular part of the female body and breasts weren't. So my obvious comment was

I'm sure the backs of Kathie Lee and Hoda's knees are very sexy.

And... I was DENIED. The only comment we got was something about offering something if you sign up as a fan to try and beat the M&M fan page. LAME. Though, they did say the first 200 people to post a comment with their email will get an email with a picture and autograph from the two hosts. I don't think I was in the 200. GRrrr.

The second round at the end of the show was no better. Sara Sage only read comments about how people were having a discussion of what their favorite body parts on men and women were. BOOOOOOring.

Until tomorrow then...

Best Week Ever - Live Show

Last night I had the great pleasure of going to see Best Week Ever w. Paul F. Tompkins Live at 92YTribeca. The show was obviously hosted by Mr. PFT and featured John Hodgman (PC from the mac commercials) as the moderator as well as Chuck Nice, Doug Benson, and a Writer and Producer (both of who's names I forgot).

The show was wildly entertaining and a lot of fun. I'm really not gonna go into it, because rehashing standup/improv is about as funny as rehashing cancer. But, I will definitely talk about the experience as a whole. It was weird to say the least.

After the jump, Hipsters galore and a trifecta of crazies.




My friend and I had never been to the 92YTribeca venue and I must say that it was very nice. Unfortunately, the moment we walked in the doors - hipsters. I had never seen so many skinny jeans and scarves before. It was like an unholy army of turd bags wrapped in trendy clothes. Not being one to judge though lies I just ignored the pilefaces standing all around me and walked up to the desk to claim my tickets.

Once my friend and I received our tickets, checked our coats, and found some fairly decent seats off to the side of the stage and behind a big pillar (we could still see the stage fine), we were bombarded with a hipster meeting bonanza. They were everywhere! I was feeling a little overwhelmed. It was like all those thick-rimmed glasses were daggers into my stained-hooded sweatshirt wearing heart.

Once everyone finally got seated - and by everyone, I mean all the people that could find seats, there were a rather large group of people that couldn't find any and had to stand against a wall like uggos as a Jr. High dance - and the show finally started late I might add, things settled down in the audience. That is, until the dude behind us started laughing...

You know how there is always that one person in an audience of something comedic that has the super loud, obnoxious laugh - yeah that's usually me. NOT THIS TIME THOUGH! Nope, the dude directly behind us felt the need to laugh at literally everything that one of the comedians said. Even if it wasn't funny. Even if it wasn't supposed to be funny. Even if it was just part of the story leading up to the punchline. GAH. And his laugh, ugh it was like the laugh of one of the hyenas from the Lion King (not Whoopi) put through that machine that makes Britney's voice listenable. This laugh continued throughout the entire show. PUNCH ME.

The final annoying part of the night was during the Q&A portion of the show. The very first question of the night was from some crazy she-beast for Chuck Nice. She had some terrifying obsession with him and wanted to know how he made it from Sex in the 90's no idea what the eff that show is to BWE. Nice was obviously a bit embarrassed about it and the creepy stalker just wouldn't let it rest. I was waiting for her to jump the stage and take him down.

A little while later, she-beast's sister got a chance to ask a question. "Ugh" was the collective feeling of the entire audience and panel. What's worse was she-beat2.0 was even more terrifying. She was apparently unhealthily obsessed Doug Benson and she wanted to make that known to everyone who would listen. Her question wasn't even a question. It didn't even make a drip of sense. It was just her profession of love for Doug Benson. You ain't gonna get nothing from him you crazy. Doug handled it pretty well, basically just making fun of her because she was such a scary.

And finally, the crazy trifecta completes itself. Loud Laugh McGee behind us gets handed the mic and starts in on Paul F. Tompkins - first congratulating him on his recent engagement and then following up with a question so brain dead that I began to wonder if there was an IQ test I missed that you had to fail before they let you in. What is wrong with these people!?

All in all, it was a great night. The show was hilarious and quite a bit of fun. It was very interesting during the Q&A when people asked real questions that made sense the cast and crew were able to talk about the behind the scenes aspect going on. I even got to ask a question! It was about BWE.tv though. Fun times and it was worth missing out on my fav shows for sure.

Early Morning Crap

- FOX News just found out about the If You Seek Amy song by Britney and Megyn Kelly is pissed the "If You Seek" off. [Videogum]

- The first look at Jon Hamm on an upcoming episode of 30 Rock. As a handsome baker! [the TV addict]

- It's the 10th Anniversary of Where in the World is Matt Lauer. And now you can choose where you want to send him! [The Today Show]

- Want the rundown on the post-Super Bowl eppy of The Office? Well, it's kind of spoilery, but it's there! [Give Me My Remote]

- ABC has green-lit the 80's lizard-alien cult show V. The updated program will focus on a female Homeland Security Agent dealing with the invasion. [Zap2It]

- NBC has a genealogy themed show about finding celeb's family history in the works entitled Think. [Variety]

- Is Susan Sarandon going to be joining Mr. Clooney on his return to the final season of ER? [TV Guide]

Best Night Ever

Did you miss you television last night? If you were like me you did because I was in NYC watching the Best Week Ever Live Show! And it was weeeell worth it mmmhmm. All your favorites (plus some behind the sceners) wrapped into one 2 hour long stage package! I also forgot to set my DVR. AAAAANGRY! Thankfully, Max Silvestri, nonronically from Best Week Ever has the obligatory crazy from American Idol and the well behaved and lady like antics of Bad Girls Club. So grab your lukewarm cup of hot chocolate, wrap up in your Snuggie/Slanket, and enjoy your day off unless you're one of the poor unfortunate souls who still has to work while you watch!

Best Night Ever: 1-27-09 @ Yahoo! Video

PROGRAMMING NOTE

Out for a bit. Be Back Shortly.

Enjoy Mr. G: The Musical from Summer Heights High.

Best Night Ever

Did you watch last night?! Superstars of Dance?! DID THE USA WIN!? I didn't watch because I was eating. Then I was watching 24. And then I was watching the series premiere of Trust Me. Well, Brian Faas has the skinny on that dance show and it's winner as well as House and The Bachelor. So grab your "Case of the Mondays" mug, smash it against the wall, and start your Tuesday off right!

Best Night Ever: 1-26-09 @ Yahoo! Video

The Office: Prince Family Paper - Deleted Scenes Round 2

NBC got around to posting a second set of deleted scenes from last weeks Office episode. In this set, the debate on Hilary Swank continues... into racism.

Style by Jury - An Uggo's Best Friend?

Since I have been back in NJ, I've been able to watch a ton of television. Like more television than I thought possible. I've also been able to experience some shows that were definitely not on the air in my small, Midwestern home town. One of those shows is Style by Jury. I'm pretty sure it's Canadian and I'm pretty sure it's one of the most obscure and unnecessary "makeover" shows out there - as you can see by this tragically long promo video courteous of Youtube.



After the jump, a 10 step rundown of how this ridiculous show works. Yeah, it's only 10 steps...



Mmmmyeah, so now that I've got you hooooooked, this is how the show goes:

1. Lure an unsuspecting uggalugg into a fake audition for a make over show.

2. During said audition, have a jury* sit behind a two way mirror and make fun of how fugalicious the auditioning subject is.

3. Reveal secret jury* and make subject listen to a playback of all the horrible things they said.

4. Reveal that they didn't have to audition, they're getting the makeover.

5. Spend the next week fixing face, skin, hair, teeth ALWAYS THE TEETH!, wardrobe, face, bad habits, posture, face, makeup, face, face, and face.

6. Bring subject back to the "audition" room all made up.

7. Make an unnecessary big deal about how the people behind the mirror are a new jury*.

8. Make subject listen to the new comments from the new jury*. Always positive.

9. Reveal secret jury* member. Always someone related, dating, married, or good friend with the subject.

10. Talk with the subject about how awesome and not ugly they are now.

It's kind of like if What Not to Wear got drunk one night and hooked up with Extreme Makeover and while things were hot an heavy, an incredibly loaded up The Swan comes in and blows its load all over the two. And for some magical reason, Extreme Makeover ends up pregnant with a terrible and horrifying inbred makeover spawn that she's too afraid to abort. So she tries drugs and alcohol. Sadly, that does not work and the pregnancy continues. 9 months later...

NBC picks up the show and puts it on after Martha. What a lead in!

WTF OF THE DAY

I know a lot of people really like Kanye West. And his blog does provide for some ridic entertainment. But really, WTF is going on below?! Martin Louis the King Jr???? What does that even mean!?


A message from kwest on Vimeo.

ADDRESS HIM AS SUCH!

Opperation 4th Hour of Today Facebook Comment On Air: Day 4

Another epic fail. Day 4 did seemed to be on a better pace than the previous, but it still ended with nothing. I was primed and ready today to get my comments on facebook around the time that Sara Sage would be reading them today. And my timing seemed pretty perfect today.

Unfortch, I was completely passed over during the first round at the beginning of the show. She read something about how people were correcting Kathie Lee for calling the Green M&M a dude and for Sara calling M&M's a Hershey's product. Tsk tsk. Honestly though, that's what you're reading on air!? COME ON. That's ridiculous. Granted, I've got such a janky short term memory I can't even remember what I wrote on there.

Round 2 seemed like a better opportunity, but it ended up only lasting a few minutes which only gave Sara Sage the time to read about two comments. For a brief moment I thought that even if she didn't read my comment, that I'd get to see it on air, but sadly they opted to show some dumb picture of a baby wearing big pants. WTF!?

So, another failed attempt. There's always tomorrow...

Early Morning Crap

^ Is Pam 'nant? [Watch with Kristin]

- You can honestly stop hoping for Lipstick Jungle to magically get picked up. It's not gonna happen. [TV Squad]

- Some of the best moments from last nights SAG Awards. [TV Guide]

- NBC and American Airlines have teamed up to offer programming on flights from everything under the peacocks feathers. [Variety]

- My favorite daughter from Roseanne has been bumped down from a series regular on The Big Bang Theory. [Ausiello Files]

- I'm incredibly glad that this shirt was made. I would honestly buy it if I didn't have any self-respect. [GMMR's Twitter]

Best Night Ever

Did you skip out on the SAG Awards because you were finally going to see one of the Oscar noms or did you miss out on Rock of Love Bus or any of your other favorite Sunday night shows because you just had to see what all your favorite actors and actresses were wearing on the red carpet? Welp, Michael Cyril Creighton from Best Week Ever has the 411 on both of those shows just in case you were a no watch. Love it.

Best Night Ever: 1-25-09 @ Yahoo! Video

Screen Actors Guild Award Winners

Like I said (read previous post) the winners for the SAG Awards were up faster than Jenna Maroney method speed walking for her Janis Joplin role. Here's the list for the television winners. Nothing too surprising. It was nice to see 30 Rock sweep the comedy roles. The winners are in bold.


Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries
Ralph Fiennes - Bernard and Doris
Paul Giamatti - John Adams
Kevin Spacey - Recount
Kiefer Sutherland - 24: Redemption
Tom Wilkinson - John Adams

Actress in a Television Movie or Miniseries
Laura Dern - Recount
Laura Linney - John Adams
Shirley Maclaine - Coco Chanel
Phylicia Rashad - A Raisin in the Sun
Susan Sarandon - Bernard And Doris

Actor in a Drama Series
Michael C. Hall - Dexter
Jon Hamm - Mad Men
Hugh Laurie - House
William Shatner - Boston Legal
James Spader - Boston Legal

Actress in a Drama Series
Sally Field - Brothers & Sisters
Mariska Hargitay - Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Holly Hunter - Saving Grace
Elisabeth Moss - Mad Men
Kyra Sedgwick - The Closer

Actor in a Comedy Series
Alec Baldwin - 30 Rock
Steve Carell - The Office
David Duchovny - Californication
Jeremy Piven - Entourage
Tony Shalhoub - Monk

Actress in a Comedy Series
Christina Applegate - Samantha Who?
America Ferrera - Ugly Betty
Tina Fey - 30 Rock
Mary-Louise Parker - Weeds
Tracey Ullman - Tracey Ullman’s State of the Union

Ensemble in a Drama Series
Boston Legal
Dexter
House
Mad Men
The Closer

Ensemble in a Comedy Series
30 Rock
Desperate Housewives
Entourage
The Office
Weeds

Stunt Ensemble
Friday Night Lights
Heroes
Prison Break
The Unit
The Closer

After the jump, the Motion Picture awards.


[image via SAG Awards]



Nothing too out of the ordinary here either. I'm really glad Meryl Streep won for Doubt as she was pretty much phenom in it. Haven't really seen anything else other than Slumdog, so can't make too many angry guesses.

Actor
Richard Jenkins - The Visitor
Frank Langella - Frost/Nixon
Sean Penn - Milk
Brad Pitt - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Mickey Rourke - The Wrestler

Actress
Anne Hathaway - Rachel Getting Married
Angelina Jolie - Changeling
Melissa Leo - Frozen River
Meryl Streep - Doubt
Kate Winslet - Revolutionary Road

Supporting Actor
Josh Brolin - Milk
Robert Downey, Jr. - Tropic Thunder
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Doubt
WINNER: Heath Ledger - The Dark Knight
Dev Patel - Slumdog Millionaire

Supporting Actress
Amy Adams - Doubt
Penelope Cruz - Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Viola Davis - Doubt
Taraji P. Henson - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Kate Winslet - The Reader

Ensemble Cast
Doubt
Frost/Nixon
Milk
Slumdog Millionaire
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Stunt Ensemble
The Dark Knight
Hellboy II: The Golden Army
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Iron Man
Wanted

Slumdog Millionaire

I finally got around to seeing Slumdog Millionaire tonight instead of watching the SAG Awards. I know I probably should have watched the SAG Awards, but in reality - all the winners are gonna be posted online as it happens so I can just catch up with everything later.

Anyways, obviously Slumdog Millionaire was awesome. Like real awesome. I'm not gonna ram it down your throat anymore than the entertainment media already has. There's a reason it won Outstanding Performance by a Cast in a Motion Picture at the SAG Awards (see what I did there). So please, do the world a favor and go see it.

I'm personally begging each and every person that reads this to go out and see at least one of the Academy Award nominated pictures this coming week/end because if Paul Blart: Mall Cop is #1 at the box office again, I'll honestly completely lose my faith in society.

Flirty Girl Fitness, More Like Whorey Slut Exhibitionism

I have seen these commercials for Flirty Girl Fitness some time now, but I really never paid that much attention to them until this morning. It was at that point that I realized how often these infomercials are on. It also made me hope and pray that there are no mothers out there that have purchased Flirty Girl Fitness that use it in front of their children.

I mean honeslty...



Lets set a super whorish example for young girls of the next generation! You wanna be skinny to be popular? Then become a stripper! Or become a... stripper!



This just makes me think of my little cousins. They're so impressionable. I'm not saying that if a little girl saw this she's gonna grow up to be a big slut, but would you really want her imitating this in any way? I'm embarrassed for this whole idea. Are women (men?) actually buying these products? And worse yet, are they buying the stripper pole accessory to go along with it!? If I came home one day and my wife had a stripper pole set up in front of the television, I would just walk out and pray that what I had just seen was a hallucination from the vast amount of anti-depressants I'm sure I'll be on by the time I'm married.

It makes me think of that scene in Mean Girls where the girls walk into Regina's house and her little sister is dancing to the Milkshake video.

Summer Heights High, More Like Summer Heights High-larious

I finally finished watching the first and hopefully not only season of Summer Heights High. It was on Fios On Demand in all it's glory so yesterday I took the plunge and watched the whole season. Granted, it's only eight episodes, but they were eight episodes I will never forget.

Honestly, if you haven't seen this Australian import, then you are doing yourself a severe disservice. Chris Lilley writes, directs, and stars in a faux-documentary style show following three people (all played by Lilley) at a high school - Mr. G, a drama teacher who often goes way overboard with just about everything, Jonah, a troubled and disobedient year 8 student with a passion for break dancing, and Jai'me, a rich, self-absorbed 11 year who transferred from a private girls school.

Instead of going into any more detail than that, I'm just going to say do yourself a huge favor and watch it! Below is the YouTube channel for Summer Heights High. Check it out, watch some videos and definitely do what you can to watch the entire season.



Also, my fav character is definitely Ja'mie. She's such a b*tch, but in that hilarious way that makes you glad you aren't in high school anymore. For example, she takes asks a lesbian to the 11 year formal just for the attention. AWESOME.

And finally, Mr. G's magnum opus - Mr. G: The Musical was quite possibly one of the greatest theatrical experiences I've ever witnessed.

30 Rock: Retreat to Move Forward

I can't help but get incredibly excited every time that I watch this show. Each episode that I see makes me feel more and more like it was made just for me. It's got my humor, it's got my lingo, it's got my jazz, it's just perfect.

Now that I'm done expressing my gushing love affair...

This eppy focused on business retreat that Jack convinced Liz to accompany him on because he was afraid to face the old suits that he hadn't seen since the whole Don Geiss debacle. Of course, she starts comparing it to a summer camp and how Jack's afraid to go back because he's afraid his camp friends will think he's a loser now so he brings Liz along for a friend. At the studio, Jenna goes method to prepare for her upcoming movie and Kenneth works on trying to get Tracy to eat healthier to avoid the 'betes.




30 Rock: Retreat to Move Forward
Season 3 | Episode 9

Things change rather quickly once they finally get to the retreat though, as Jack is accepted back just like old times and Liz is forced to befriend some of the nerdiest of the corporate drones.

Back at 30 Rock, Jenna gets tricked by Frank into checking Janis Joplin's Wikipedia page for bio info because she was going method to prepare for her role in Joplin's biopic. Obvs, Frank starts editing the Wiki page which eventually leads to an interesting moment between the two. It's sex.

Meanwhile, Toofer convinces Tracy that diabetes isn't caused by poor eating and lack of exorcise - a government conspiracy from the Civil War Era. Kenneth, terrified that Tracy's poor eating habits will lead to the sugars, he sets out on trying to scare him into living healthier.


The Good:

- Everything. Honestly, this show is the best show on television. It just is.

- Tina Fey. She proves time and time again that she is a smart, funny, talented and beautiful. I don't think I have a higher compliment to give.

- The show being able to take itself out of 30 Rock and still be money. Kudos to 30 Rock and The Office for both attempting and wildly succeeding with finding the funny outside their respective shows' settings.

- Frank and Toofer made an appearance! Complete with speaking parts!

- Jenna almost attempting to eat a live cat.

- Jenna doing basically everything else she read off of Janis Joplin's wiki page.

- Jack's psyche up speech.

- THE HILL WITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1one11!!!exlamationpoint.

Meh, Just Gas:

- The Kenneth/Tracy side story was a little weak, but still provided some lollerz.

The Crap:

- Jenna hooking up with Frank. I know she's got the crazy in her, but come on! Granted, that's a tiny gripe and the outcome was hilarious.

---------------------------

I don't have much else to say other than I love this show more than my own life. I'm sick in head though. Oh the Frank Schlong.